Periodic Percolations
Black Lives Matter - some things you can do
Yesterday morning, millions of us went back to work, just like every other Monday. Many of us were upset by the events of the weekend. And, many (if not most) of us did not have the space to process these events or tried to do so on social media or with family — probably with not very good outcomes Pretending that these events didn’t happen isn’t an option. Indeed there’s a high likelihood that these events – and the subject of race in general – is going to show up in our workplace conversations.
We believe these conversations deeply matter and need to happen at work. However, if they aren’t held well, they can lead to harm. If you’re looking for support in holding these conversations, we’d be happy to help. Be it supporting white-identified folks in conversation about race (a.k.a.white caucuses) or developing intentional and reflective conversation-based workshops to support your people, we can bring our experience and willingness to step into the messy conversations with you.
Putting what matters "in the center"
I’ve been fortunate to have an interesting career. It’s taken me to some unexpected places, and I’ve learned a lot about ways we can show up along the way. Early on, I learned a lesson that has stayed with me: what we center in our work is critical. It’s critical in how we experience our work. Perhaps more important, it’s critical in how we encounter each other.
How does your connect-o-meter work?
The connect-o-meter was initially a joke that started between me and my partner early on in our relationship. As introverts, we get deeply immersed in our alone time, making the transition into couple time bumpy and awkward, with both of us quick to be offended and hurt. The patterns that make it hard to reconnect run deep in both of us, of course, but we were committed to changing them. We just didn’t quite know (yet) how to ease and/or accelerate through the bumps and awkwardness.
So, one day, after about 3 hours of bumping along and wanting to just fast-forward into being connected, I turned to Jonathan and blurted “I wish we had a connect-o-meter so we could see where we are on it! Then we would know what to do!”
The Great Transaction
Why would people put coffee down as their #1 priority over, say, increased autonomy or mastery? My take is this: it's what is at the center of the relationship between the director and their employees. A better way to say this might be that it's what is at the center of a relationship between an an organization and its employees[1]. Here's another frame: there is a story that we are living in about what it means to be in relationship with our superiors, or the organization we work for. One way to look at that story: we are in a transactional relationship.
When we are in a transaction mindset, we are always in a negotiation. If I give you a coffee maker, will you do your jobs just a little better? Will you give a higher score on the survey next time? That's the deal that the director was making.